TFS#43: Survive With Stillness

We live in a world where we are rewarded for being efficient. And being efficient means we have more space on our plates so it’s easy to take on more responsibilities.

When we tack on more responsibilities we are also using more bandwidth to process what’s going on. That combined with too much information…and perhaps past baggage, will wear us down.

Feeling fear and feeling nervous will be common agitations that arise from outside pressure.

How we choose to deal with them will vary, but the first step is always acceptance.

Acceptance

The most common approach when we feel fear is to think “I shouldn’t be afraid of this, I shouldn’t feel nervous.”

So we naturally push these emotions away. But we need to expend energy to keep them away, and ironically we are putting the spotlight on the emotions. So these negative emotions grow…

“What am I going to do without my loving family.”

“I don’t want this project to fail.”

“I’m going to let my teammates down.”

The first and most important step is to admit to yourself that you are feeling the fear of whatever lies ahead.

Everything Comes And Goes

Things come and go, emotions come and go.

Once we’ve accepted them, we can choose what we want to do with them…

As opposed to being controlled by them.

I see my teammates, colleagues, and my past self, consumed by a particular fear.

“Don’t mess up, don’t forget, don’t let so-and-so down,” we say to ourselves—but what happens? We’re so afraid of what might happen, we don’t take the proper steps and end up allowing what might happen, to actually happen.

Know that everything will pass. Good emotions, bad emotions, we’ve all had our ups and downs. But what remains, is you.

Stay still. You’ll outlast those bad moments.

Unpacking It

Once we can settle and collect ourselves, we can begin unpacking our fears.

We can look at the feelings and begin to look at it for what it really is which is nothing more than your imagination running it’s course.

Whatever it is you need to face, whatever you’re doing will require that you don’t defeat yourself. Don’t make it harder by overthinking, doubting, or by second-guessing.

That space in your head, it’s yours. You must control what gets in, and control what goes on in there. You have to protect yourself from yourself, from your own thoughts. And not with brute force, but with consistent sweeping.

Because your mind is a scared place.

Keep it clean and clear.

For Your Jiu-Jitsu

→ Most of your hard work goes unnoticed. Just remember that you train for yourself and have nothing to prove to anyone else. These 10 behind-the-scene tips will help you get a leg up in your game.

→ If you’re feeling frustrated or unable to finish what you started, you should consider this idea . (It applies to everything you pursue.)

→ Having to go up against bigger people is always a challenge. Watch this video to get a few pointers on how to deal with stronger opponents .

→ A great way to diversify your stand up game is to explore take downs instead of relying on guard pulls. Here’s a great solo drill you can use to warm up and familiarize yourself with the moves.

And that’s it for this week. When you find yourself clouded with emotions, give yourself the opportunity to stay back.

Stillness will lead you.